Eddie Izzard Jokes – Funny gags during stand-up performances

Stand-up comic, actor and voice-over artist Eddie Izzard has a comedic style full of rambling, whimsical monologue and self-referential pantomime. He is heavily influenced by Monty Python, and John Cleese once described him as the ‘Lost Python.’ Izzard is also known for his transvestism, and for running 43 marathons in 51 days for Sport Relief in 2009 – having never run long-distance before.

His stream-of-consciousness delivery jumps between subjects as he constantly interrupts himself with new joke ideas. Izzard is also famed for his gifts for mimicry and mime. He returned to the stand-up stage in 2009 after a six-year break, and has a string of film and TV successes under his belt, from Ocean’s Thirteen to Day of the Triffids and countless chat and game show appearances.

Best Eddie Izzard Quotes

  • If you’ve never seen an elephant ski, you’ve never been on acid.
  • If God had written the Bible, the first line should have been ‘It’s round’.
  • The first coherent line ever spoken was ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about.’
  • We have two hundred languages in Europe. Count them! I know you won’t!
  • I am a professional transvestite, so I can wear heels and not fall over. If a woman falls over wearing heels, that’s embarrassing. But if a bloke falls over wearing heels, it’s the end of your life.
  • I grew up in Europe, where history comes from.
  • What shall we call our son so he doesn’t get the shit kicked out of him at school? Englebert Humperdink! Yes, that’ll work.
  • There’s not much makeup in the army, is there? No. They only have that night-time look, and that’s a bit slapdash, isn’t it?
  • I am two lesbians in a man’s body.

Watch a clip of Eddie in stand-up action:

Eddie Izzard also appeared in David Mamet’s Rage on Broadway. He also once played three comedy dates in St Albans with fellow funny guys Reginald Hunter and Dylan Moran. Eddie also previously made the autobiographical film Believe: The Eddie Izzard Story.

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