Noel Fielding – Funny Quotes from Stand-Up

Artist, comedian, and actor Noel Fielding stars as Vince Noir in award-winning cult comedy series The Mighty Boosh, co-written with Julian Barratt. An experienced stand-up, his routine incorporates surreal stories, physical comedy, characters, and songs.

Mighty Boosh DVDFielding has also had roles in some of Channel 4’s more off-beat comedy programs, from Nathan Barley to The IT Crowd. Last year, he was made a team captain on BBC panel show Never Mind the Buzzcocks. He has co-hosted Comic Relief Does Top of The Pops, appeared in various music videos and starred in five episodes of BBC Radio 2’s Vic Reeves’ House Arrest. He won a Sexiest Man award in 2008, and his flamboyant sartorial style has also garnered him a Best Dressed Male gong.

Here are some funny lines from his stand-up gigs and interviews.


  • Catch the vision, smell the dream. Make toast and put it in your anorak.
  • We didn’t want to be known as Barratt & Fielding, we’d just sound like a company of solicitors. The Mighty Boosh is more flexible and it’s amusing watching people saying boooosh.
  • My nan had a cat with one eye. It walked into walls and tables. I used to think it was hilarious. It was a slapstick cat.
  • When I was a little kid I wanted to be Face (The A-Team). I thought, cos I had blond hair too, that when I grew up I’d look like him.
  • You know the black bits in bananas? Are they tarantulas’ eggs?
  • It’s impossible to be unhappy in a poncho!
  • I’d like to punch out a really old lady. There’d be no repercussions.
  • I used to suck Smarties until they were white, let them dry, and then put them back in the packet and show my mum the colourless Smarties.
  • I never did that badly with women when I wasn’t on the telly, but it’s a bit out of control now. Strange, because I think I look like a troll wearing a woman’s wig backwards.

Here are duo Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt in character with The Mighty Boosh.

You are welcome to throw your thoughts, more quotes and love for Noel in the comments section below.

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3 thoughts on “Noel Fielding – Funny Quotes from Stand-Up”

  1. OMG I love noel and the boosh noel is the sexiest man EVER! and HILARIOUS! im obsessed love you noel!!!!

  2. How the HELL does he look like a Troll in a Womans wig?!?! Hes the most sexiest man alive, and the funniest! I am utterly obsessed with The Mighty Boosh thanks to him.. 😛

  3. Strangly sexy!! Lets not forget his memorable appearence on ‘Nevermind The Buzzcocks’ … ”Motorbike made of jelousy…’ cracks me up everytime!

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